the brotherhood
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
I think back and I realize that the way we began to knew each other was kinda random, and more or less a stroke of luck (no I'm not talking about my relationship anymore, I've moved on).
To me. you are sorta a Godsend? I don't know but strangely enough I feel that, maybe I'm beginning to like you.
It is so not appropriate for me to be thinking about all this at this time but, I can't control it. Having gone through one serious relationship in the past, I daresay I know what it feels like when I genuinely "like" someone.
I met you a few months back and we met in person, about a couple of months later, of course not just us two that would be weird.
I looked at you, and suddenly I felt this strange feeling of attraction and guilt, because I knew I shouldn't fuck myself up over realtionships again. But as I said, I just can't help it. Furthermore, it doesn't help that a good friend likes the same girl, and he knew her way way earlier than me so I'm feeling kinda screwed up right now. Rather bitchy y'know?
As time goes on, I realize that barely a day goes by without me talking to you and when we don't there's this empty space like in my mind just waiting to be filled. So, screw MSN, I pick up my phone and send you a text and as usual, your reply is ever so prompt, and friendly to boot.
We've been growing alot closer in the short time we've known each other. But I am so scared that this will turn out just as before, we developed "trust" then bam, reality gives you a cold slap in the face.
You don't know but whenever I feel down, when I talk to you, I cheer up for 2 reasons. 1. Cos I'm talking to you and 2. Because adding two negatives together never make a positive. I can throw chairs in class in the morning, shout fuck at classmates point the finger at teachers but when it comes to nightfall, I never stop smiling when I talk to you because, that's what I have to do.
Perhaps it is all this that I do that gives me so much of your trust. Well, you have to trust me one more time when I say I will never betray your trust and I'll never let it go.
I like you so much and the things which you do seem to show it to but as I said in my previous post, it's probably wishful thinking on my part, I must be hallucinating.
Because out of all the guys in the world if you choose Daryl Cheng, you're kinda stupid.
